GV in March: Fragile Seedlings, Strong Earth

I’m reading: Gabi Fitz’s most recent newsletter, Flood Waters. She runs Think Twice Consulting. Over the last six years (!), she’s become my favorite collaborator and a dear friend. I love the way she puts the world together.

I’m listening to: Yin Yin’s The Rabbit That Hunts Tigers. A groovy reminder to be like water.

UPDATES:

CAPACITY UPDATE

I’m scoping projects for the fall! Here are a couple of refreshers:

• my services 

• descriptions of projects, past and present

LEARNING/REMEMBERING:

RELATIONSHIPS CHANGE OVER TIME

This is an “of course” lesson that I tend to learn over and over again in different ways and on new levels. The most recent reminder that relationships change their shape over time came from some in-person facilitation work with a long-term client.

We’ve been working together for years now—we’ve both grown (a lot) and seen each other through quite a bit of change. Slowly (or quickly. Who knows! I’m still processing this lesson), the group began to care more about my opinions of their input and ideas than the questions I was asking. Folks started to hold back: we were no longer working out loud together, making mistakes, and being curious.

I think this is natural. As we do this work—which is personal, emotional, and at times tense or frustrating—together, we start to care for each other (and the animals, kids, and spouses we see in each other’s Zoom backgrounds). We might begin to care about each other’s approval more than the process. I don’t think it’s conscious! I especially don’t think it’s malicious. Approval-seeking is a well-worn pathway in many of our brains.

Curiousity, compassionate critique, and honesty are pathways that take more energy, more presence. More vulnerability. (Thanks, Donita, for helping me remember this.)

There’s a note in adrienne maree brown’s Holding Change that I never imagined would apply to my work:

I am not comparing myself to adrienne maree brown, and my experience with one client is not the same as a seismic shift in my career and visibility. That said, I share this to name the grief I’m feeling in this moment.

The good news is that this “relationship shapeshift" feels kind of like alchemy—I get to train this organization’s staff to facilitate themselves. And that’s the point! If one of my consulting engagements comes to an end and the organization still has to rely on external consultants to do some of this work, I’d consider it a failure. Some lessons I’ll probably have to learn over and over:

• positive growth often comes with grief

• new relationship dynamics require new enablers for growth

• my boundaries as a consultant and a facilitator are dynamic and will change over time

• …a million other lessons all of the time

FINDING JOY PART 2:

Last month I used this section as an excuse to share the progress I’d made on painting a 1978 Italian racing bicycle - in a New York Mets motif! I’m doing that again (and this is probably not the last time).

She's up and running! This is the second time I’ve reassembled this bike, and it was so much easier the second time around (my mechanical skills are improving, and I’ve gained a lot of strength since getting a PCOS diagnosis last fall—I know what my body requires to be healthy, wow). Plus - she’s more stable and her brakes are more reliable. I took her on her first all-out ride in Prospect Park this weekend and never stopped smiling.

The Mets’ opening day is this Friday. They’re down 2-1 but HEY it’s the beginning of the season and I believe in the power of friendship.

QUESTION:

How do you understand “collaboration” vs. “coordination” vs. “cooperation” vs. “networking”? (these levels come from this framework - it’s issue-specific but I think it’s applicable to all orgs)

I think that we in the social sector and social sector-adjacent organizations talk a lot about collaboration when what we’re really talking about is coordination or cooperation. Since inauguration I’ve spoken to several orgs—from nonprofits to tech and service providers—who are really excited about talking about collaboration, but also really nervous for other organizations to see their tech, their data, or any of their other intellectual property. How do you all navigate this tension?

ABOUT GV:

Genevieve (they/them) runs GV Advisory - Guided by collaboration, humanity, and joy, they help social impact organizations embrace data and cultivate a learning culture. This work enables organizations to evolve into entities that operate based on evidence and relationship to community. Reach out to Genevieve at [email protected].